Friday, September 20, 2013

4. Going Hungry (she was always hungry, always...even when she took a bite, she wanted more..her evolution continues)


His voice permeated through the thick fog and I heard him say that name again. He said Cassandra and the others raised hands with something in them. I heard Owen’s voice commanding and strong. I heard the others and their voices. They were not happy with each other. I felt this much more than I heard or say it. And then I heard a very sharp noise like a needle piercing fabric. I heard the bones of my neck pop and my vision moved swiftly up to the ceiling then the ceiling fell away and the floor came up beneath me. A great echoing sound reverberated through me. All I saw was white.

I heard screaming and more sharp noises like many of those needles popping through fabric. I smelled something and it reminded me of something else. I was hungry again.

I still wanted to move, in fact, I still wanted to walk. As I stared at the white surface, I realized that I was hungry and I wanted to go for a walk. Walks were soothing to the stomach. I reached up to touch my face but I could not feel my skin anymore. There was nothing, no longer a slight sensation. There was absolutely no indication that my hand had reached my face; except for the fact that I could just barely make out my fingers in front of my eyes. I started to reach for the white surface in hopes that it would help me find my way outside. My hands grasped at the white ocean of nothing. I pulled at the air until I heard that beautiful sound. The one that sounded like a blooming thing inside me. The sound that momentarily made me forget my hunger.

“Cassandra” he spoke and moved into my line of vision. Owen’s face obstructed my view of the white thing….I think it was the ceiling, yes that was it. He was frowning and he has splatters of something on his face. He spoke again, “Cassandra, are you….I mean, I have to get you out of here.”

I didn’t feel his hands grasp me but my whole body registered the pulling sensation as the ceiling turned into the wall and the wall turned into Owen’s face again. I realized that I must have been lying down. Something was wrong with the left side of my head, I stumbled and fell back to the floor.

“Cassandra, get up!”

I just watched his face then. My vision started to clear and it made me gasp. Could this be, could I be getting better? I saw a clear for once since I had woken up. I saw the contours of his face, the hairs of his mustache and his stern eyes. I felt like I was smiling but I had no idea how to do that anymore. I heard the sounds around me; they sharpened suddenly and I could hear everything. I heard strange moanings coming from somewhere close, I heard the alarm clock going off in the other room and I could hear Owen’s breathing…it was sensual. I reached toward his face and my hands were no longer stiff. It was a miracle. I was alive again.

My stomach growled angrily. I was hungry. I was so very hungry and it was making my head hurt. I realized in that moment that I could feel. A burning flew through my wrists and up into my arms. My head began to pound. The pain intensified to a point where I felt like crying out.

“Cassandra, your eyes are clearing!” Owen spoke excitedly and smiled. “We have to go now. We have to get out of here. I have done a really bad thing.”

I looked around Owen and saw the man and woman that he had arrived with. They were both lying on the floor in pools of crimson. I swallowed a knot in my throat. My mouth was livid. I forgot about the dead people on the floor and went about the task of turning my jaws this way and that. I opened my mouth wide and stuck my hand inside.

I watched the confusion in Owen’s face. He was quiet, studying my face as I was playing with my mouth. My arms started to ooze from the wrists. I had smeared the dark liquid all over me.

Owen pulled me to him and wrapped his arms around my shoulders. I rested my flexing jaw on his shoulders. I was so happy that I could barely contain the words.

“I….I……I’m A…aliveee” I stammered.

Owen run his hands over the top of my head and sighed very deeply. “I know you are, Cassandra. I found you. We must go and find a safe place where I can clean you up.”

I said nothing more. I was thinking of things…fragmented things. I was still hungry.

“I have to find the guns that your brother left. Do you know where he stashed the guns?”

I said nothing because I was so fecking hungry.                                                                        

“Cassandra, I need to know where the guns are because we have to go out there again. Those things…they…they do bad things. They are zombies, Cassie, real life zombies. I mean, I guess. I saw them attacking people.”

I could feel the warmth of his flesh as it radiated against my cheek. I hadn’t felt like this since before. His smell was intoxicating and delicious. I was so damn hungry, when was he going to feed me?

“I was so worried about you, Cassie. I thought, I thought they had gotten to you.”

Owen pushed back from me and looked into my face. He frowned and spoke, “Oh dear god, we have to get you some medical help, Cassie, your head is bleeding. That bitch actually did graze your forehead. “

I just stared at him. I felt the oddest feelings coming over me. It was like how you feel when you know you are about to have the best sex ever. My thoughts were clear, my mind was not clouded by anything. I suddenly remembered my birthday, his birthday, I started to remember quotes and things from movies. I realized that I hadn’t been this intelligent in life. I was absorbing something from Owen.

“Ow,,,Owwen, I …..I’m…I’m hungry.”

Owen smiled and spoke. “well, have you no food here?”

I just stared at him and all I could say was, “I am hungry, Owen.”

Owen frowned because he saw something in my eyes. “Cassandra, something is wrong.”

I lay my head back onto Owen’s shoulder and I could smell his flesh and it smelled like nothing I had ever smelled before. It was better than the drugs, it was better than hearing my own name bloom inside my mind and it was holding me there with him. I wanted to be no where but here with Owen. I rubbed my lips against his shoulder and realized just how very ravenous I was. I was hungry. Oh god in heaven, I was starving.  I saw pictures in my head of our kisses, our lovemaking from the past. I started to kiss his shoulder then up to his neck.

“Cassie, what are you doing? We really don’t have time for that now and you are a mess.”

I ignored his words and continued to nibble his neck. I found this to be the pinnacle of my desires.

I stopped and pulled away. I found myself staring at his flesh and wanting more. I had no second chances in that moment. I had no regrets and no wasted moments. In fact, suddenly and without warning, my intelligence faded and the fragments of everything returned. Owen’s rambling words that we should leave this place; they disappeared into the fog of my brain. The only senses remaining to me was my sense of smell and sense of taste. I tasted bile in my mouth and a little blood. I had nothing left to say, I was hungry. I hungered and hungered and hungered for Owen Bartholamew.

I opened my mouth and put it against his flesh. He jumped slightly and let out a surprised yelp. But it was a little late for that. I clamped my teeth down shut on his throat and wrapped my arms around him.

I must really love Owen but I ate him. I mean, I took bites out of him. He shoved me away but it was done. I had ripped out a big part of his throat and he just didn’t make it. His face was odd. I could barely see him but I could just make out questioning glance that wanted to know why.

I was so hungry…god I was hungry. Funny thing is, I am still hungry and I have the overwhelming urge to just take a walk.

Maybe, just maybe my vision will clear again and I will understand things . I want to understand what I am. It seems like I was something else at one time. It seems like there was someone else. I have this suspicion that there are others who are not like me.

I have to walk, I have to eat. I am so hungry. Something is terribly wrong.

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